Phoenix Idiotarod
February 26th, 2022
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What in the...?!??!

It all started in San Francisco some time around 1995 with an event that
they dubbed the
"Urban (name removed so the Iditarod Trail Committee, Inc. doesn't sue us)". In
2004, New York City got a hold of it and made it
ridiculous. Feel free to Google search on that action.
The Phoenix Idiotarod is a charitable shopping cart race in which teams of
five
"idiots" group themselves with a modified grocery store shopping cart and run through the streets of Phoenix. The race usually
features people in costumes and themed floats. The races are fun competitions where sabotage, costume, and presentation are rewarded.
Yeah?
Phoenix has a lot of cool creative people living here, and many of them are right
downtown. A group of us decided that Phoenix needs to start doing more fun
stuff. The Idiotarod wass the first in several events being planned for our fair
city.
What else?
"
The Four P's"
PARTICIPATION!
What else were you going to do on a Saturday in February that would be
this much fun? Seriously, get off your tivo/roku/hulu addicted ass and
grab a hacksaw or a sewing machine or a can of gold spray paint and get
started!
PARTY! Well, a KICK-ASS after-party of course! A portion of the entry
fees will go to
buy a keg or two of decent beer, booze, cups, ice, etc. Every participant gets a
free invite to the party!
PRIZES! The First place team is a bunch of idiots that COMPLETELY MISSED THE
POINT OF THE RACE. Prizes will be awarded as the race marshalls and organizers see fit.
We look for things such as team costumes, team/race spirit, creativity,
etc... There may be additional prizes announced along the way too!
Pickled Radishes! Nevermind, we're not sorry. We still think this
was funny.
Sold!
So you want to do this eh? Just follow these four simple
steps!
Step 1: Recruit a 5-person team.
Step 2: Register your team.
Step 3: Get a cart and show up with it and your team on Race
Day!
FAQ
- Who can race?
- Anyone who is at least 21 years of age. Unfortunately, the
checkpoints are at bars, so if you're under 21 you might have problems
getting past the checkpoints. Feel free to forward this invitation to
anyone you know!
- Isn't it going to be cold?
- Only until you start running! The race goes off rain or shine,
blizzard or breeze. Bundle up. (yeah, that would be a sight!)
- What's the route?
- That's up to you. The race begins in downtown Phoenix. We will
announce a few checkpoints and a finish line on race day. You choose the
fastest path.
You will be held for 20 minutes at each checkpoint. There will be booze
at the checkpoints. We really encourage everybody to support the bars
that support our events like this. Bring cash!!!
- Can you tell me how long it will be?
- I sure can!
- Well how long will it be?
- Oh! It will be approximately 3-5 miles. Since you choose your own
routes, it could be a lot longer though!
- What time do we show up?
- On Race Day, you should show up about an hour or two early. Get there
by 11:00AM at the latest, because the race starts promptly at 1pm. By
3pm,
you should be done with the race and celebrating.
- Can we get drunk?
- It makes the pain go away. Just sober up before you drive your
car/truck/van.
- Are there rules?
- Yes, so many that they have their own page!
- Does my team need its own shopping cart?
- Yes.
- Where do we get a cart?
- Drive around until you see one.
- Are you suggesting we steal it?
- No. Find one that isn't at the supermarket and bring it back to them.
On the way, enter this race with it.
- Can we modify our shopping cart?
- Yes, although there are rules -- kind of like stock car racing. Your
shopping cart must roll on the original hard rubber caster wheels (no air
filled tires). As a general rule, you can attach things to your cart, make a
riding platform, and grease up your wheels. You can also chop up the cart
and rearrange the pieces -- but they all have to be accounted for. And
because teams have asked in the past, no, your shopping cart can not be
motorized.
- What do I do with my cart after the race?
- Take it back to the store where it belongs. The cart misses its
home. Oh, and the cart's friends and loved ones too.
- What is this going to cost me?
- Dignity. Plus your entry fee.
- Can I make a side bet?
- Absolutely.
- I want to race but my friends are lame. Is there a team I can
join?
- Maybe. Join the email
list, and you can ask around for help.
- Is there a way that I can participate without racing?
- Absolutely! We're going to need race marshalls and other volunteers.
Keep your eyes open on this site and the discussion list for volunteer
meeting information!
- This sounds funny. Can I bring my video camera and document it?
- We would much rather you race. We think you'll have more fun. But
yeah, you can come cheer on the teams at the starting line or at any
of the checkpoints. And, fine, bring your camera.
- Can my team wear matching outfits?
- I think you should! There will be prizes for Best in Show, Best
Costumes, etc.
- Why are you doing this?
- Because it's important to fight cold and kill boredom. What else are
you doing that weekend?
- But seriously?
- Yeah. We want to live in a city where people do ridiculous
things to amuse others -- and themselves. And because we believe the
most important thing you can do with public space is use it.
- Where did you get the idea for this event?
- We stole it from a group of people who did it in Seattle.
I think they stole it from a group of people in NYC. They stole it from a
group of people in San Francisco who have been doing it for 10+ years.
There are also people doing the same thing in other cities, like Ann
Arbor, Michigan for one. The Idiotarod debuted in New York in 2004. People
loved it. There are a lot of stories and photographs about the event at
their website: www.precisionaccidents.com.
- Who won last year?
- Check the Results page for as much as we
can remember.
- Where can I get more information?
- Use the links at the top of each page on this site! Or go ask your
mom.
- Will there be an afterparty?
- Yes. An undisclosed site will host the official award show
and afterparty. There will be music, DJs, dancing, and libations. It's
going to be great. Register now! Your
pre-registration monies will directly fund this event!
- How do I sign up for the race?
- At the Registration page.
- Will my shirt get dirty?
- Not only will your shirt get dirty, your nice pants will get ripped
and you will have no idea what happened to your underwear. Deal with it.